Golden
by Butterfly Heart
Summary: Tony is a genius and has more money than anybody else on his school. He is also sixteen, short and has to wear braces. Having to tutor Steve doesn't really help with that, especially because Steve is a little weird. Maybe things will get better if Tony starts the best band ever?/HIGH SCHOOL AU, Superhusbands, beware-a little NSFW.


Thank you for reading this.  
Pairings: Superhusbands, Clintasha, BuckyxNatasha, PepperxHappy  
Warnings: NSFW, teenage drama  
Enjoy!

/ GOLDEN/

Tony does not hate or think lightly of himself. In fact, he knows that he is cleverer than 93% of the students in this school and he has about eight times more money than them.

Still- he is sixteen years old, has damn ugly braces and is a lot smaller than the other kids his age. The only thing that keeps him from getting mocked is the fact that his father basically owns the school and everyone assumes that they'd be in deep trouble if they roughened Tony up. Meanwhile, Tony is pretty sure Howard wouldn't give a shit besides telling him to man up, but he keeps that to himself because of obvious reasons.

So no, Tony doesn't have inferiority complexes in the least, thank you very much. It's just that sometimes he is a little lonely between his numbers and equations. Of course, he is not REALLY lonely, it's not as if there aren't a handful of people who are either very good at ignoring his inability to socialize properly or have similar behavior. There is Bruce, and Bruce is his soulmate in a completely platonic way, but even though Bruce totally understands how Tony works-not only because he works quite similar-, he is in his own sphere quite often.

Then there is Pepper and really, nobody should blame Tony for crushing on her so hard for a while that he once ran into a lamppost because he was staring at her so much. Pepper is fierce and determined and frightfully competent; she forces Tony to do his homework at least once or twice the week to show good will, reminds him to eat like his mother never did and generally just coddles him like a child sometimes, even though she is a whole year younger than him.

Rhodey, Rhodey is his best friend forever since Tony built him a rocket in kindergarten at the age of three. Sometimes Tony has no clue why Rhodey puts up with him like he does, listening to his ramblings with the patience of a saint and trying to convince him to join a sports team on a regular basis. Being the captain of the football team of Shield High, it's probably understandable, but Tony really is no team player.

To be fair, he probably is not socially adjustable at all, even though he tries. The problem is, people don't like it when you're younger and still three times cleverer than them and so he doesn't really get invited to anything and if he is, well—chances are that he manages to piss off the host and the cool kids five minutes after he entered the room. People don't really talk to him except if they want to ask how much money he has exactly and if he could do them a favor, which he could, but never does except for Pepper and Rhodey.

Which is why the first thing he says when a handsome guy with a sharp-angled jaw, cutting cheekbones and weary eyes grabs his arm after a lesson is, "Nope, won't help you meet Justin Bieber."

"Thanks for saving my life, then, " The guy says dry as gin and quirks an eyebrow. "I need your help."

"Again, no Justin Bieber for you," Tony says because when he is cornered by a guy who is bigger and seemingly more willing to get into a brawl and winning than him, the only thing he has left is his wit and his genius. "Guy's an asshole anyways."

The guy looks as if he is torn between amusement and the urge to hit him. "Well, people say you're clever."

"I'm cleverer than 99% of this school," Tony corrects him and deliberately forgets to add Bruce and Reed Richards to the equation.

"Whatever," The guy says in an almost bored tone and Tony blinks at the dismissiveness. "Steve, a friend of mine, needs serious help in maths and physics. You're a genius, well, he needs a genius to help him out because otherwise he's doomed."

"Why doesn't he ask me himself, then?" Tony asks.

"Because he's a stubborn idiot who thinks he can do everything himself," The guy snorts and holds out his hand. "I'm James Barnes by the way, but special people call me Bucky, which is why you will call me James."

"I'm not sure if I like you or hate you," Tony says and shakes his hand. James grins before shoving his hands in the pockets of his faded jeans.

"C'mon, say yes," He says and sounds almost friendly. "I've watched you at Johnny Storm's party last week. You were very amusing. Not good with people, huh? A little contact with Steve'll do you good then. As long as you don't turn out to be a woman, he'll like you. He's got a fondness for little shits."

"Is that why he's friends with you?" Tony shoots back and James blinks before he laughs.

"Yeah, that's the reason alright," He says and looks at him almost fondly. "What about it now?"

"Sure, why not, we can try," Tony says because he has a lot of free time he spends with being bored anyways, might as well fill it with yelling at clueless idiots.

"Cool!" James says and sounds honestly happy about it. "You're free now? Good. Come on, lemme introduce you. Nice braces, by the way. You remind me of the little girl living across the street of Steve's house."

"Fuck you," Tony says and follows him.

/

Steve, it turns out, looks like a hipstery porn star.

They find him in the arts room, red paint smeared across one cheek like blood as if he rubbed it while having forgotten that his fingers are full of paint. His neatly combed, blonde hair makes Tony want to mess it up, run his fingers through it and just tousle it into chaos. He wears vintage clothes and the music Tony can faintly hear when he puts the big headphones attached to his iPod out of his ears sounds vaguely jazzy.

"Oh, hi, Bucky," Steve says and smiles at them both. Tony feels vaguely like run over by a moose while getting repeatedly hit with a Laundromat. It should be forbidden to smile like that. Also, it should be forbidden to have eyes that blue. Apparently, nobody cares about Tony's proposal for new laws. "Who's your friend?"

"Tony," Tony squeaks and wants to hit himself for sounding like a flustered girl when he should be appalled at not being recognized. "Uh, hi."

"Hi." Steve wipes his hands on a dotted cloth and moves over to shake his hand. Tony likes the way he grips his hand: firm, but not tightly enough to crush his fingers. What he definitely doesn't like is that Steve is about ten inches taller than him, maybe more.

"That's your new tutor for maths and physics," Bucky tells him and gives Steve a look Tony knows from Pepper: It's the "for God's sake, get your fucking shit together, you embarrass the whole mankind with the way you behave"-look. Tony wonders if Bucky is Steve's Pepper and grins at the thought. Bucky shoots him a suspicious look, but continues, "So get your shit together, you need all the help you can get, you stubborn mule."

Steve frowns, but then he lets out a long sigh and looks at Tony before suddenly blushing furiously. Tony stares at him in bewilderment. Bucky rolls his eyes. Steve coughs, coughs some more and finally says, "Alright. It would be great if you could, uh, help me."

"Sure," Tony says and forcibly restrains himself from giggling like an idiot because Steve is even prettier when he is all red in his face.

"I feel like Dr. Frankenstein, pretty sure I've created a monster right now," Bucky says and sighs.

/

"Pepper, you don't understand," Tony says desperately over lunch. "I need to form a band. I _need _to."

Pepper looks at him over the rim of her glass and raises an eyebrow. She does that sometimes, just silently raising that eyebrow and waiting for Tony to give up whatever ridiculous- brilliant, Tony always insists, but Pepper has none of that- plan he has formed at the time. This time, Tony doesn't back down. He probably only shrinks back into his chair a little.

"Why do you need to form a band, Tony?" She says incredulously, "You don't even know how to play an instrument."

"I play the piano!" Tony protests.

"Tony, you played the piano when you were seven, then you gave it up because it bored you."

"Not true. I gave it up because my teacher was an asshole, not because I was bored."

"Either way, I'm pretty sure you'd suck at playing the piano or keyboard now."

Sometimes Tony hates Pepper because she is almost always right. "But Pep," He says and really _doesn't _whine, thank you very much. "I need a band."

"Why the hell do you need a band all of a sudden?"

"Because bands are cool, right?" Tony says, "And I'm cool too."

Pepper shoots him a pitying look. "Alright," He amends and unconsciously touches the place where the braces dig into the inner side of his upper lip. "But maybe it's time to become cooler, you know, conquering the world and stuff."

"Tony, is this about a girl?" Pepper asks with a sigh and pushes one of her fiery-red bangs out of her forehead. "Because if it is, I'm pretty sure it won't impress her if you have some sucky band you can't even contribute to."

"This is _not_ about a girl," Tony says vehemently, because it isn't. "This is not about trying to impress anybody, honestly, this is just about me becoming cooler, Pep, and you know it."

/

"So, I have a band," Tony says casually.

"Oh?" Steve says and looks up from the equation he has been brooding over for ten minutes now. It makes Tony impatient that Steve can't seem to find how _easy _this is, even though he already explained it two times. "You do?"

"Yeah, well, I'm currently in the process of forming it," Tony says graciously. "But it will be pretty cool, you know."

"I'm sure it will be," Steve says and smiles shyly. Tony wonders how somebody can sound so painfully honest, but then, he also wonders how someone with the body of an Adonis can be so sweet. "Could you explain that to me again? Sorry, I just really don't get the logic behind that."

Tony sighs. They're in the middle of the park on the opposite of the school and it's a really nice day with lots of sunshine and Steve's hair is still ridiculously neat. "Alright, so you start with-"

"Never mind, I got it!" Steve suddenly interrupts and scribbles down the correct solution in his neat, little handwriting before beaming at him. "Is that correct?"

"Uh, yeah, actually it is!" Tony says and it's probably not nice to sound that disbelieving, but Steve doesn't seem to mind. Instead, he just smiles in honest joy at him and shuts the notebook he wrote in before carefully tucking it into his schoolbag.

"Thanks a lot, Tony, I get this stuff much easier when I study with you," He says sincerely and Tony swallows because Steve has really, really blue eyes. Really blue eyes. "Can we do this tomorrow again?"

"Sure," Tony says and smiles at him. Steve looks at him, really _looks _at him and then blurts out, "I would like to draw you", before blushing furiously and averting his gaze. Tony gapes at him. Steve blushes even more. Tony is a little worried now; he has no idea what he should do if Steve's head exploded.

"Sorry, I just-never mind, that just slipped past my-well, see you tomorrow," He stammers and Tony watches him with utter confusion when he hastily walks away as if retreating not-so-composedly.

Well. That was strange.

/

"HULK SMASH!" Bruce roars from underneath his costume. Tony has no idea why he keeps the ridiculous job as the mascot of Shield High's football team, but apparently running around and hitting things while roaring uncompleted sentences helps him with some anger management issues, so Tony doesn't really complain.

"So how's it going?" Rhodey asks him before he yells at his team, "That what you call push-ups, you little pansies?"

Tony winces in sympathy at the collective groan coming from the team and continues to lick his ice cream. "I'm about to start a band."

"A band?" Rhodey asks in disbelief. "Tony, you don't play any instruments. And don't gimme that shit of you having played the piano once, that doesn't count."

"Did you talk to Pepper?" Tony asks suspiciously.

"HULK WANT MORE PUSH-UPS FROM TEAM!" Bruce yells in the distance. Honestly, Tony doesn't know why he needs mascot training, but well. Whatever makes Bruce happy. Also, it seems to work in terms of motivation because the team moves a little faster.

"Probably," Rhodey admits with a grin. "But seriously, what would you do with a band? Is this about some girl?"

"It's _not_, I just like to make music, okay?" Tony says a little too snappy, causing Rhodey's eyebrows to shoot up.

"Okay, sorry, since when are you that into music besides AC/DC, Black Sabbath and all that stuff? You wanna found a rock band?"

"Sure, why the fuck not?" Tony says and honestly, why not? He could do this. He could—"Wait, don't you play the bass?"

"Cello," Rhodey says.

"Whatever, close enough."

"No, Tony," Rhodey says, "Fuck no, don't even think about it. The answer is no."

/

"So, how's it going with Steve?" Bucky asks and sips his coffee. Tony doesn't really know why, but somehow they became friends. Very snarky friends, but friends indeed, which mostly means that Bucky goes Mama Bear not only on Steve anymore, but also on Tony if anyone says something not absolutely positive about him when Bucky is near. The only one who can insult Tony is Bucky, at least that is what Bucky says. Tony doesn't really say anything against that, mostly because Bucky has a mean swinger and finds a lot of joy in "beating assholes up who should know better than going against people who are weaker than'em, those fuckers".

"Uh, good? He said he wanted to draw me last week," Tony says. Bucky spits his coffee all over the floor (and over a tiny little girl who squeaks indignantly, but Bucky smiles charmingly at her and offers her a paper tissue, making her blush in the process).

"He said he _wanted to draw you_?" He asks incredulously while wiping his mouth. "Are you fucking serious?"

"Yeah? Why?"

"Holy shit," Bucky says and snickers. "You have no idea, have you. Oh boy, this is awesome. It's like a bad romcom."

"What the hell?" Tony says, because _what the hell_, but Bucky only snickers louder.

"Never mind, you'll figure out, Steve's not exactly subtle," He says very helpfully and claps him on his shoulder. "So I heard you're about to start a band?"

/

"Bruce," Tony says and tries to shake Bruce awake, but Bruce only grunts and drools some more on the table. His glasses are askew. Tony, being the awesome friend he is, carefully pulls them off Bruce's face, folds them and puts them aside, then he lowers his mouth to Bruce's ear again and whispers, "Bruce, you wanna be my drummer?"

"Okay," Bruce says more than half-asleep and yes, Tony totally got that recorded. He is such a genius. Sometimes he wants to kiss himself, but then, that would be strange and probably not a good idea since two mouths with braces- well. Not a good idea.

/

"Hey, Tony," Steve greets him and Tony stares at him because Steve wears a very nice shirt. A _very _nice shirt. Tony has enough very nice shirts at home to know a very nice shirt when he sees one.

"That's a very nice shirt," He says, because it _is_. Steve promptly flushes beet-red and awkwardly rubs his neck. It's adorable.

"Uhm, thank you," He says and smiles warmly.

"Meeting your girlfriend or something?" Tony inquires because to his own surprise he finds himself really interested in the answer. He wonders what kind of girl there is that deserves a ridiculously attractive, honestly good-hearted guy like Steve. His girlfriend is probably a total bitch; it's always like that with honestly good-hearted guys.

"No, I-I don't have a girlfriend," Steve says a little hesitantly and sits down on their usual bench before pulling out his notebook.

"Oh, that surprises me, I'm sure you could get them all, you know, just like Pokémon, only with girls, I'm sure they all love this attractiveness combined with good manners and all that stuff," Tony says and means it, but somehow Steve looks a little miserable.

"I don't really want a girlfriend, Tony," He says and looks at him as if he tried to burn a whole in his head. Tony doesn't get it.

"That's cool," Tony assures him, "You probably only need the right girl to cross your path, don't you, you don't seem like the do'em-and-leave'em-type of guy."

Steve sighs heavily and rubs his forehead, looking even more miserable. "I'm not," He finally agrees and sounds a little resigned. "Can we start now?"

"Sure, cool with me," Tony agrees and sinks into equations. He forgets about Steve's strange behavior; numbers, he finds, are so much easier to understand than people.

/

Steve is _good_.

Steve probably isn't good with maths, but he is so, so good with paint. Tony stands in the atelier and watches him with held breath because Steve paints like a mad man and sure, Bucky told him to just meet Steve at the atelier and take him with him to Bucky's little home party, but Steve paints like a mad man and Tony realizes that he is beautiful. There is nothing neat or meticulous about the way Steve paints; Tony has seen him draw some sketches before, but this, this is something else. This is just emotion, raw emotion and thought formed along color and canvas and Tony holds his breath and watches.

Tracks the streaks of paint on Steve's body, the bright, blue streak on his temple, the red dots in his hair. Looks at the way Steve moves, completely in a strange, flowing rhythm to the, around the, against the canvas. Swallows. Tries to remember how he got in that situation. Hears Steve hum, completely at ease with himself.

"Hey," He croaks because Bucky waits for them, and Steve whirls around, smiling so bright and wide that Tony blinks because if that is what a mad man looks like, he has no idea why anybody should want to be normal.

"Hey," Steve says and looks at him, really looks at him, smile still so bright and wide, and Tony swallows again, trying to rub his suddenly sweaty hands dry against his much too expensive jeans without Steve noticing, and he can't stop looking at Steve. "What're you doing here?"

"Party," Tony says, and then tries again, "Uh. Bucky's having a party. He says he wants you to, and I quote, "move his sorry ass over here, or else I'll go into his room and burn his collection of LPs"."

"He wouldn't do that," Steve says with wide eyes and quickly scrubs his hands with soap under a faucet before drying them. "I didn't know his father was away."

Tony shrugs. "Apparently is. You coming?"

"You coming too?"

"Sure!" Tony exclaims and Steve laughs, throwing the small towel in his direction. Tony catches it, stares at it, doesn't know what to do with it, so he follows an impulse and stuffs it in one pocket of his jeans before feeling silly for it and pulling it out again to lay it on a nearby table.

"Then I'm coming," Steve says and steps over to him.

"I already have half the band, you know," Tony blurts out and Steve smiles. "I just—It's gonna be awesome."

"I know," Steve gently says and his hand makes a small movement towards him, before settling down against Steve's side again. "Let's go."

/

Tony wonders when exactly he became friends with Steve, but apparently he is because Steve spends almost the whole evening beside him, chatting when he has to say something, listening when Tony rambles about everything that goes through his head- which is a lot, because alcohol makes him loose and feeling good and creative-, and at around midnight he is probably the only sober person on the entire party, so Tony leans over and tells him, "You should drink something, I mean it must be awful to be the only sober person at this party."

"I'm fine," Steve gently replies. Somewhere, something crashes, followed by a whoop of laughter and more crashing sounds as well as Bucky yelling at some poor soul. Tony grimaces in sympathy and leans a little against Steve because Steve is warm and solid and feels good and okay, maybe he slumps against him more than leaning, but it's hard to do anything else when the room's spinning like it does.

"You're so good," Tony tells him and Steve flushes again. "I mean, honestly. Look at you. And yesterday you helped an old woman across the street. I mean, who _does _that anymore besides scouts."

"Well, I was an eagle scout for a long time," Steve says a little indignantly before he cringes a little. "But I wasn't very good. The asthma kept me from doing things and I'm generally not a very healthy person. Well, I was, now I'm better."

"You have _asthma_?" Tony almost yells and Steve cringes a little again, but he nods and Tony has no idea how he couldn't have noticed that. "Why did you never tell me?"

"Well,you...never asked? I don't know. I don't really go to people and tell them, 'Hi, my name is Steve Rogers and I am asthmatic', you know."

Tony laughs at that, because it's funny, okay. "Well, you're the coolest asthmatic I have ever met," He tells Steve. And then he sort of passes out.

/

"Is it true you just passed out on James Barnes's party last week and puked into his pot plant the morning after?" Pepper asks him and tries not to laugh. Sometimes, Tony really hates Pepper.

"So I need a guitarist or two and someone for the keyboard, because every band has a keyboarder," He tells Pepper instead of answering and takes a bite of his toast. His parents are away again, but he doesn't really mind because that means he has the whole house for himself. Well, except for Jarvis the butler, but Tony loves Jarvis more than his father, so he doesn't mind.

Pepper sighs and pinches the root of her nose. "Are you serious?" She finally says.

"Sure. Bruce and Rhodey are already in."

"Tony, you bullied Rhodey into saying yes and asked Bruce when he was half-asleep."

"Totally counts. Now they're enthusiastic about the whole thing. Bruce even started to learn how to play the drums!"

Pepper sighs again. "Alright. I'll make an audition."

/

"Hm," His dentist says. Tony stares at the ceiling, tries not to suffocate on his dry-sucked tongue and resists the urge to swallow. He feels like a flopping fish on the fucking ground. "Well, that looks much better. We can notch it up a little, then."

"Haaaahhh?" Tony says. His dentist pats his head and calls his assistant.

"New wires," He cheerfully tells him while tweaking around in Tony's mouth and really, he hates the entire thing. "You'll like it. They are a huge step in your treatment!"

"Huuuuuh," Tony says, even though he meant something along the line of "good".

When he gets out of the building, his entire mouth hurts and he sighs. Three days of eating only ice cream and soup with a straw, then. It's not as if the damn braces aren't shitty enough already.

/

"I think they are cute," Steve tells him and immediately flushes again. He seems to do that a lot. Tony looks up from his tomato soup and frowns.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" He asks and shakes his head. "They're hideous."

"They're not," Steve insists and smiles fondly at him. "You look really good even with them. I think they're a nice extra, but they surely don't make you unattractive."

"You know, that sounded really gay," Tony snorts and, after a slight, hesitant pause, Steve replies very calmly, "Well, I am."

Tony gapes at him. Steve flushes a little, only the barest hint of pink in his cheeks, but meets his gazes steadily, almost daringly. Tony remembers to blink.

"Oh," He says and coughs a little, "Sorry then. That wasn't very nice, was it."

"It's okay," Steve says and smiles a little. "You're okay with it, though?"

"Yeah! Sure! Why shouldn't I?" Tony protests and Steve visible relaxes, smile widening.

"Okay, then," He says and returns to his sandwich. Tony keeps staring at him and thinks that a lot of things Steve did and said make a lot more sense now.

/

"He's _gay_," Tony tells Bruce, because somehow that's all he can think of these days. Bruce looks up from the robot they're working on and pushes his goggles up his head. "How could I not notice something like that?"

"Well, maybe because he didn't scream it into your face and you can be a little-well, ignorant of these things?" Bruce suggests with his usual calmness and reaches for the screwdriver. "It's not a problem for you, is it?"

"Of course not!" Tony protests, "But I like girls."

"That's okay, too," Bruce says amusedly. "You can like whatever you like, Tony, nobody will care."

"Dude, I'm Tony Stark," Tony says, "People _would _care. People always care. But I like girls anyways, so it's not a problem."

"Can we continue working then?" Bruce says, "I've got a drumming lesson in an hour. By the way, what's our band name?"

/

"What about 'The Flying Monkeys'?" Bucky suggests and laughs his head off. Tony almost pours his coffee over his head, but in the end, he values coffee too much for that. "No, seriously, how does Rhodey manage to be in a band while also being football leader?"

"He doesn't," Tony says gloomily and picks at the Styrofoam cup. "He's probably ten minutes there, complains all the time and then disappears because the coach wants him to do something."

"You know," Bucky says very carefully and doesn't look at him. "I've got a-friend. She plays the guitar quite well."

"A friend?" Tony inquires and grins when Bucky grunts. "Is it complicated? Do you love her?"

"Yes I do," Bucky says to his surprise. He surprises him even more when he fumbles for a pack of cigarettes and lights one of them. "Don't tell Steve I'm smoking again."

"I won't if you tell me about that friend," Tony says because he can be a little shit.

"You little shit," Bucky says affectionately and ruffles his hair, before taking a deep drag from his cigarette. "Well, I've known her for ages, even longer than I know Steve, y'know. Her family was friends with my mother back then in Russia. When she moved here to marry my father, they moved with her, so Natasha and me, we've always been very close, even though we lost each other for a while when her parents died and she came into an orphanage. Found her again, though. I'll always find her."

"How come I never met her, then?" Tony asks. He doesn't know if he should ask about the way Bucky grew up. There is something hard in his eyes whenever they come close to that topic.

"She doesn't go to school here," Bucky replies curtly. "She goes to Red R. High. She's about to move to Shield High this semester, though. You know, she's really fucking great with a guitar. She can dance too."

"You guys are together?"

"Nah," Bucky replies with a laugh, "Wouldn't want to lose her because of something like this. I don't think our friendship would survive that. Besides, she's got a thing with one of the archers of our school at the moment, what's his fucking name-Cliff, or something like that. I don't know, man. I don't like his face."

Tony tries to avoid a grin. "Okay, then," He says very calmly. "You think I should try her, then?"

"Sure. I'll make sure she'll meet you."

/

"What about 'Tony and the Trololos'?" Steve suggests and grins a little. Sometimes he has a weird sense of humour.

"Do you know a girl called Natasha?" Tony asks and Steve looks surprised.

"Bucky's Natasha?" He inquires, "Sure thing. She's a nice girl, even if she needs to warm up to people a little and you never know what she thinks."

"I noticed that," Tony says and grimaces. "Met her during my auditions yesterday. Frightening, sexy as hell and holy shit is she capable of playing the guitar."

"She is," Steve agrees. "She and Bucky played together sometimes when she still lived in the same neighborhood as us."

"She and Bucky?"

"Well, Bucky plays the piano," Steve says a little surprised, "My mother taught him since he was a little kid, we had an old piano on the floor where we lived that belonged to nobody in particular. Kept him out of trouble sometimes or, well, most of the trouble anyways. He's pretty good, too."

"That asshole," Tony says and means it.

/

"What about 'I Don't Know What I'm Doing'?" Pepper suggests with twitching lips.

"Very funny," Tony says and definitely doesn't sulk, thank you very much.

"You're really serious about this, aren't you," Pepper says and sounds a little impressed. Tony beams at her and nods.

"We need a singer, though," He says and frowns.

"What about you, then?" Pepper suggests. "You always beat me at Singstar. Maybe it's time for you to climb the stages, tiger."

"You know, that's actually a pretty good idea," Tony says.

/

"So how about this guy from physics," Tony says and watches Steve trying to solve his equation. It's quite funny, actually. If you look close enough, you can see Steve thinking.

"What guy from physics?" Steve asks and sounds a little distracted, nibbling on his pencil while frowning at his notebook.

"You know, the one with the blonde locks," Tony says, "He's cute and intelligent and he always stares at you during class."

"...Since when are we in the same physics class, Tony?"

"Since yesterday. You should ask him to go watch a movie with you or something."

Steve sighs and puts down his pencil. "Are you trying to set me up, Tony?"

He doesn't sound angry, but he doesn't sound too happy either, so Tony tries for a, "Probably?"

"He's not my type," Steve replies shortly before picking up his pencil again. "I like brunettes, or so I've found. Besides, I like to pick my partners myself. Okay? Can you help me with this now?"

"Okay," Tony says.

/

"So what about that girl from biology, you know, the one with the long, black hair and the blue eyes, sort of high cheekbones too," Steve says.

"Alright, I get it," Tony says.

"Good," Steve says and smiles a little.

/

"No," Bucky says.

"C'mon!" Tony tries, "You could play together with Natasha! I'll even pay you!"

"No," Bucky says.

"I'll pay you a lot?" Tony tries again.

"How much?" Bucky asks.

"How much do you want?"

"Deal," Bucky says and grins wolfishly. Tony swallows a little and reminds himself to make a contract.

/

"Is that aftershave?" Tony asks and leans forward to sniff on Steve's collar. Steve,just as predicted, blushes. "I can't believe you're wearing aftershave, Steve."

"Yeah, well, do you like it?" Steve asks hesitantly. Tony sniffs again, just to make sure, and shrugs. "It suits you."

Steve smiles and rubs the back of his neck. "So, how about 'Phillip's Glasses'?"

"Dude, no. We don't even have a Phillip in the band."

/

"I told him his aftershave was nice," Tony tells Pepper. Pepper raises an eyebrow at him, so he continues, "I mean, isn't that pretty gay?"

"Tony, did it ever occur to you that you maybe, probably, might be a little gay?" Pepper says gently. "I mean, you really seem to like Steve, don't you?"

"Yeah, but I like boobs," Tony says a little confused, "I mean, who doesn't like boobs? They're so soft and squishy and- oh shit, you have boobs. That was not very polite of me, right? Sorry."

"Tony, I can handle talk about boobs," Pepper assures him with an amused grin. "And you know, you can also like both. Or like only some people. Or no people at all. You're not asexual, are you? Thinking about sex with other people doesn't leave you cold, does it?"

"Uh," Tony says and then flushes a little. "Definitely not."

The thing is, after that he practically can't stop thinking about how Steve might look underneath his very nice shirts.

/

"HULK DESTROY EVERYTHING TEAM LOVE!"

"Listen, Tony, I'm definitely not drunk enough to have this discussion with you, even more so because I have training at the moment, which you didn't seem to notice," Rhodey says and looks a little stressed. "Our next game's next week, I don't really have any time."

"HULK ANGRY!"

"Come on, Rhodey, I can't do this without you!" Tony pleads and actually tries the puppy eyes. Rhodey purses his lips before giving in.

"Alright," He says, "Band practice next Saturday. Two hours, Tony, then I need to go."

"Awesome," Tony says.

"HULK SIT ON YOUR FACE!"

/

"God, Tony, you're ridiculously stupid sometimes," Bucky sighs and rubs his temples. He is a little tense these days; the only person he's really nice to is Steve. "How can you not _see_? I mean I would understand if he was really, really subtle and not trying at all, but-"

"I have no idea what you're even talking about!" Tony snaps and Bucky sets his mouth in a grim line before grabbing him by his shoulders.

"Listen here, you lil shit," He says and Tony would have laughed if it wasn't for the serious expression on Bucky's face. "Steve likes you. A lot. He probably doesn't like you in the way you like him because he's courting you, in his strange, old-fashioned way."

"What? He doesn't-"

"Tony. He wears his best shirts whenever he is about to meet you. He wears aftershave. Do you have any idea how often I've seen him wearing aftershave before? Damn rarely, I tell ya. He fucking _draws _you, holy shit, do you even know what sort of people Steve draws, _paints_?"

"Uh…no?" Tony squeaks and thinks that there are a lot of things he doesn't know about Steve.

"Important people," Bucky hisses. "He sketches many people, but he only paints the important ones and right now, he's working on a canvas with your eyes in a fucking huge size on it. So, he likes you, but you don't get it. It's okay if you don't like him back that way, but at least now you know."

/

Tony gets really, really drunk after that.

/

"Was it worth it?" Steve asks him when he wakes up, having an enormous headache and no memories of the last night, and he manages to look both worried and angry. "Do you have any idea what you have done? You knocked on Bucky's door and simply passed out, nobody could wake you, luckily my mom's a nurse else you'd be comatose in a hospital right now, what the hell was that for?!"

"I'm sorry," Tony says, because he is, but then he winces because his own voice is too loud right now. A lithe, almost frail-looking woman comes in and smiles gently at him. Tony doesn't even need to look into her face or her blonde hair tied into a neat bun to know that she is Steve's mother; they have the same smile. For the first time, Tony realizes that he is on a very comfortable couch in the middle of a tiny living room. He has no idea where he is.

"Uh, welcome to my home," Steve says and still sounds really, really pissed off.

"You scared us all quite a bit here, my dear," His mother says and Tony blinks because her voice is like a melody, with an unmistakably Irish accent to it. "Here, drink this."

Tony dutifully swallows down whatever she hands him and then looks at Steve again. "It wasn't worth it," He confesses, "I feel even more like shit."

"Language," Steve's mother says. "I'm Sarah, by the way."

"Nice to meet you, Mrs. Rogers, I'm Tony," Tony says and Mrs. Rogers laughs at him.

"Just Sarah, please," She says and then leaves the room to get some food. Tony doesn't want to think about food right now.

"Why did you do it?" Steve says and now he looks just sad. "I just-alcohol is bad, Tony, and it doesn't solve any problems at all."

"Did you try to solve your problems with alcohol once?" Tony asks.

"No," Steve says and hesitates a little, before continuing with a strong voice, "But my father was an alcoholic, so I know in fact that alcohol doesn't solve anything."

"Shit," Tony says because now he knows why Steve doesn't drink, doesn't he, and he has no idea what to do. "Is your father—is he still…?"

"He died a few years ago of alcohol poisoning," Steve replies and sounds a little gentler this time, "It's alright now, Tony, mom and I are fine. Do you want to tell me now why you did it?"

"So, I think you might have turned me gay," Tony blurts out- which really, really, really isn't the best thing to say at all.

/

"So, I think Steve's mad at me somehow," Tony says and licks ice cream off his fingers. It's blazingly hot outside today and the sun is merciless.

Bucky, who has been swearing about the weather for all of ten minutes now, snorts. "No shit, Sherlock. I wouldn't have guessed with how he stormed into my room and yelled, 'I'm so mad at Tony!', y'know."

"He did?" Tony says and sighs, "He doesn't talk to me."

"This is shit 'cause he's gonna have exams last week," Bucky says and lights a cigarette. "He's just sulking, you know. Probably because it wasn't really nice of you to accuse him of having turned you gay."

"But he did!" Tony protests. "I'm having all these gay thoughts recently, like, like-how does he look without his shirt?"

"Pretty awesome," Bucky assures him. "No, really, he works out, you know, I mean as much as he can work out with his asthma. But it's gotten better over the years, his asthma I mean, so he works out quite a lot."

"Ungh," Tony says, and then adds, "I think about what it would be like kissing him."

"He's a very passionate kisser," Bucky says, "He kisses as if going to war."

Tony stares at him.

Bucky shrugs his shoulders. "I was his first kiss. He discovered he was gay, I discovered I was not. That's about it."

"Okay," Tony says and decides to freak out about that on another day. "But fact is, I never had any gay thoughts before Steve."

"Oh c'mon, that can't be true, everyone has gay thoughts at some point," Bucky says and rolls his eyes. "Okay, okay, I get it: You're freaking out because you can't stop thinking about Steve's ass and his abs and that six pack, right?"

"Ughn," Tony says rather eloquently and flushes deeply.

"I'll take that as a yes," Bucky decides and rolls his eyes again. "C'mon, Tony, maybe you'd like it, what's stopping you?"

/

"Alright, people!" Tony says and claps his hands. Natasha looks at him as if he was nothing more than a circus monkey to her, which he probably isn't. He grins at her anyways. "We're starting with something easy! What about 'Shoot to Thrill'?"

"Aw hell no," Rhodey says, "I'm not playing that."

"But we're a rock band!" Tony argues.

"Who decided we're a rock band?" Natasha cuts in smoothly and raises an eyebrow. "I was not asked."

"I'm getting paid, so I really don't care," Bucky offers helpfully.

"Wait, why does _he _get paid?" Bruce protests from his corner where the drums are situated.

"He doesn't."

"He gets paid and I don't? You asked me in my sleep and it doesn't count as pay-worthy?"

"Well- yeah."

"Then I'm not playing," Bruce says and drops his drumsticks before folding his arms. He is the moodiest teenager Tony has ever met besides himself.

"What _are _we even playing now?" Natasha inquires.

"'Shoot to Thrill'," Tony says.

"Aw hell no," Rhodey says, "I'm not playing that."

/

"-And then we just spent half an hour glaring at each other," Tony finishes and sighs. "I don't know, this band is probably the worst mix of people ever. Bucky and Nat, you never know whether they are dying of unresolved sexual tension or simply pissed at life, Bruce wants to get paid and Rhodey argues about almost every song ."

"You need a manager," Pepper decides and sips her Evian. "I volunteer."

/

"Hey, Steve," Tony says. Steve turns around from his canvas and frowns.

"Did you bring strawberries?"

"Yeah, uh," Tony says and shoves the box in Steve's hands. "They're for you."

"Uh," Steve says and peers down at the strawberries. "Thank you?"

"Listen, so I might be a little gay for you," Tony blurts out and really, why the fuck does he never manage to start an important discussion with Steve in a decent way? "That's-that's nothing bad, really, I just-I was really-And then I wasn't really sure how to handle this and I couldn't stop thinking about kissing you and Bucky said everyone has gay thoughts at some time and my band is crap."

"I'm sure it isn't," Steve says because _of course _the first thing he'd notice about Tony's ramblings would be his worry about his band. When he puts the strawberries aside, Tony watches him wearily because he can't figure out if Steve will punch him or not.

Steve doesn't punch him.

Instead, he leans in as if he wanted to kiss him, hesitates long enough Tony can stare at his weirdly close, ridiculously long eyelashes and then asks, "Can I kiss you?"

"Okay," Tony says, so Steve does.

/

"Okay, so I might be a little gay," Tony tells Pepper. Pepper's lips twitch.

"I would have never guessed," She says.

/

"Can I ask you a question?" Tony asks.

"HULK NOT LIKE PUNY GUY'S FACE!"

"I couldn't keep you from doing so even if I said no, so do tell, please," Rhodey says with a sigh before he yells at his team, "Faster, faster, are you senile old hags or strapping young men?!"

"So I have these weird, very inappropriate boners every time I see Steve," Tony says.

"Oh God," Rhodey says and looks horrified.

"HULK SMASH!"

"I mean, _all the time_. Whenever I see him, I pop a boner. Poof. All of a sudden. It's getting really awkward, you know, not only for me. Well, especially for me, though."

"I'm really not drunk enough for this conversation," Rhodey says.

"So what should I do?" Tony asks a little helpless, "I can't run around sporting a boner all the time, but I don't really want to avoid my-Steve!"

"You can say boyfriend, Tony, I'm pretty sure Steve's not in for a casual fling, especially since I think you guys-" Rhodey grimaces a little, "-haven't done anything so far."

"Not really," Tony says.

"Oh, good."

"I mean besides some kissing and, you know, I lifted his shirt once."

"Oh God."

"Oh, and one time he had his hands on my hips and one of them was underneath my shirt. That was pretty exciting, not gonna lie."

"Shit," Rhodey sighs, "You guys are adorable."

/

"I'm not avoiding you, I just get a boner whenever you touch me and it's getting really awkward and I didn't really want to tell you because I don't know what to do and Rhodey doesn't help at all and the Internet is full of strange people," Tony tells Steve the next time Steve comes to him with the eyes of a kicked puppy, asking what he did wrong to scare Tony away.

Steve blinks. "Oh," He says and flushes strawberry-red before awkwardly rubbing his neck. "Well, I-well, we could, I mean. Uhm. Uhm."

"Sex?" Tony says because apparently he has no brain-to-mouth-filter, but Steve just manages to blush even more before nodding hesitantly. They silently stare at each other for a moment.

"Probably not right away," Steve decides and Tony agrees.

/

When Howard finds out, he hits him with the newspaper in his face several times. Then he hits him with something else than the newspaper and well, Tony knows when to fucking leave the house.

/

"So, I thought about it and I should definitely sleep at yours for a few days," Tony tells Steve when he opens the door. Steve stares at him.

"Did somebody hit you?"

"Uh, yeah, my dad, actually," Tony says. Steve grabs his arm and hauls him in. "Mom!" He calls, "Tony's staying for a few days, is that okay?"

Mrs. Rogers comes out of the kitchen and stills when she sees Tony, then she swears in a language that sounds like Gibberish and rushes back into the kitchen only to come back with an ice pack.

"Sit down," She orders and gently presses the ice pack against his eye. "Who did this to you? Steve, get the blanket, the poor boy's shaking."

Steve gets the blanket and securely wraps it around him before sitting down beside him and taking his hand. "It was his dad, mom."

His mother smiles down at Tony, but her eyes are hard. "You can stay here as long as you want, Steve's bed is big enough for both of you," She assures him and then, very calmly, adds, "Now excuse me for a minute, please."

Steve and Tony watch her disappear into the kitchen again.

"I'm sorry," Steve says quietly.

"What the fuck are you sorry for?" Tony asks.

"For, you know. All of this."

"Oh come on, Steve," Tony snorts, "You didn't _really_ make me gay, you know. I might have been a little gay even before I met you."

"No, _you_ listen to _me_ now," Mrs. Rogers suddenly yells from the kitchen, "Because if you ever dare hit my son's boyfriend again, Mr. Stark, I will make sure that there is not one single newspaper in this God damn country that won't know about it, are we damn clear here? I don't give a damn what you can or can't do! Have a good day!"

"Your mom's pretty awesome," Tony says.

/

"So how the fuck did you manage to get into jail?" Tony asks Bucky seriously impressed. Bucky purses his lips and cracks his knuckles. His knuckles are very, very bruised.

"Don't tell Steve," He says, but Steve already knows and yells at him as soon as he sees him.

"I can't believe you!" He shouts and grabs his shirt, "What are you doing? You're not a kid anymore, James, you can't go around and get into trouble without facing some serious consequences! Since Natasha's in Shield High, you've gone absolutely nuts! You can't do this, Bucky, come on. You're a good guy, I know you."

"You always bring out the best in me," Bucky answers, but it sounds defeated.

/

"Alright, guys!" Tony says and claps his hand.

"I'm getting really tired of this handclapping shit," Rhodey murmurs, "I feel like a kindergarten kid being herded back into the house after a day in the garden."

"Where is Pepper?" Natasha asks, "At least she's competent."

"What do you mean, 'At least she's competent'?" Tony says indignantly, "I am very competent too! I can totally do this!"

In his corner, Bruce snorts and pretends to wipe his glasses clean when Tony looks at him accusingly.

"So, where _is_ Pepper now?" Bucky inquires.

"She's having a date with some guy with a pretty ridiculous nickname, Lucky or Sad or something," Tony answers and he's really not sulking, thank you very much, it's just that it might be a little hurting to be stood up for a guy named Lucky. Or whatever.

"Alright, what are we playing then?" Bruce asks with a sigh.

"'Evil Walks'," Tony says, "Reminds me of Natasha."

Natasha shoots him a dirty look. Bucky grins.

"Aw hell no," Rhodey says, "I'm not playing that."

/

"So, Rhodey will probably leave the band because he's really stressed between the band and football," Tony tells Steve. They lie in Steve's bed, facing each other, and the only light in the room is the light from the streetlamp filtering through the window. It's bright enough to let Tony see Steve looking at him and he swallows and snuggles closer against his chest. "And even though he promised to stay until I have found someone else and be a replacement, this means I'm without a bassist again."

"What about Thor from my history class?" Steve suggests a little sleepily and gently interlinks their hands. Tony feels a little giddy.

"Thor? He's really called Thor?"

"He moved from Asgard High to Shield High," Steve explains and smiles a little. "You know, the kids from Asgard High are a little weird, but Thor is really nice. You can't help but like him."

"Okay," Tony says and then decides to just go with it. "So, uh...Wanna make out?"

Instead of an answer, Steve gently slides a hand into the nape of his neck and pulls him a little closer, kissing him softly. Tony doesn't really understand why Bucky told him Steve kissed him as if he went to war, because Steve never kisses Tony like that. Instead, he kisses him as if he was the most amazing of the entire fucking world and yes, that gives Tony a colossal boner indeed and there is no way of hiding it. Steve doesn't seem to mind, though; instead, he lets his other hand carefully stroke over Tony's side and kisses him a little deeper, tongue and all.

Tony holds his breath and carefully lifts Steve's shirt. Steve hesitates a little, but then he helps him pull it over his head and puts it away. Tony squirms until he half lies on top of Steve, which is, okay, it's pretty amazing because there is so much warm, muscled body underneath him and he is allowed to touch all of it, so he decides to be really daring and just does.

Steve makes a sound as if he is dying and jerks against him. Tony can't help but grin when he sees Steve's wide eyes and runs a hand lightly over his chest. Steve moves his hand to his hips and presses him a little closer, gasping when their erections touch and Tony can't help but rub against him and it feels so, so good, really good, he can't help digging his hands in Steve's shoulders, pressing his face against his neck and closing his eyes because it's a little too much of everything and everything is so close, and he is coming with a very undignified noise and it's the best thing _ever_. _Ever._ Even though he still wears his boxers.

Steve shifts a little underneath him and makes a sort of desperate noise, so Tony presses a palm against the bulge in his sleeping pants and sort of-tries out a little until Steve shudders against him and comes with a quiet, "Well, fuck."

It takes a while for them to catch their breath, especially for Steve, and there is a moment where Tony worries Steve might have an asthma attack and what the fuck should he do then-but then Steve smiles at him, lifts his hand and presses a kiss against his knuckles and God, who _does_ that anymore, really.

"I'll go get a towel," Steve says then, very pragmatically, and slips out of the bed while Tony realizes that he is, technically, not a virgin anymore.

/

Thor is fucking huge.

Tony resists the urge to stand on tiptoes and clears his throat. "So, I have a band and we need a bassist," He says, "By the way, are you into metal?"

Thor looks at him a little confusedly and exclaims, "Verily, I am! I am Thor Odinson of Asgard High! You are Steven's paramour, I take it?"

"Uh, I'm his-Tony," Tony says and clears his throat again. Thor beams down at him as if he was throwing money around while yelling "Free alcohol for everyone!", which he really isn't and would never. Really. "So, he's told you about me?"

"Most certainly!" Thor exclaims- Thor doesn't seem to know how to speak with a normal volume, but Tony is fine with that; he finds it a little amusing, actually. "He said you need my assistance for this band you mentioned! I will gladly be of help, my friend, if my skills please you!"

"Uh, cool," Tony says and wonders if Thor will veto every song too.

/

"Who the fuck is called Happy anyways?" Tony demands to know. Pepper just laughs and sips her coffee. She seems happy- no pun intended-and is a little flushed; it suits her.

"You'll like him," She assures with a bright smile and puts a hand over his, "I like him very much."

"So Happy makes you happy then?" Tony asks and sighs when Pepper nods. "Alright, then he is allowed to stay. Still checking his background, though, and if there is anything, anything, if he even only stole as much as a candy bar sometime, he gets the fuck away from you."

"I love you like the annoying little brother I never had, Tony," Pepper says and hugs him tightly.

"I'm older than you," Tony says indignantly and hugs back.

/

"Alright, ladies, come on, we have a schedule," Pepper says and claps her hands. Nobody complains; instead, everyone starts to tune their instruments. Well, except Thor, who stands there with his bass in his hand and beams at all of them, and Bucky, who plays a little tune on the keyboard nobody recognizes. He fucking aces the keyboard, Tony has to give him that; it's nice watching him play. Apparently, Natasha thinks so too, because at some point, she just looks up and watches Bucky's hands.

"So, what are we playing today?" Bruce asks.

"We're having a mixture of metal, rock and pop today, to find out what this band is best in," Pepper replies. "Any objections?"

"Nah," Bucky replies.

Tony throws his hands in the air. "Why are you never objecting to anything Pepper suggests?!"

"Because Pepper is awesome," Natasha says.

"Pepper knows what she's doing," Bruce agrees and has the decency to look apologetic. "Sorry, Tony."

"Sorry my ass," Tony mutters and yelps when Thor slaps his ass. "What the fuck are you doing, Thor?"

"I thought you wanted me to give your backside a little high-five!" Thor exclaims and looks confused. Natasha snickers. Bucky doesn't look amused.

"Hands off, Thor, that ass belongs to Steve," He says sharply. Tony is a little glad about it. Thor looks apologetic. Bruce looks thoroughly embarrassed.

"My apologies!" He exclaims and slaps Tony's shoulder so hard that Tony buckles a little.

"Let's make some music, people," Pepper says and sighs. "By the way, do we have a band name by now?"

/

"I think I should come listen to your band practice," Steve says all of a sudden. It's hot today and his mom is away running some errands. Tony looks up from where he is fiddling with the rolls of Steve's desk chair and looks surprised, but Steve doesn't look at him. Instead, he sits on the edge of his bed and stares at the ceiling.

"Sure, but why, I mean, all of a sudden?" Tony asks.

Steve shrugs. "I heard Thor joined your band," He says and still doesn't look at him. It's one of these rare moments Tony has an epiphany.

"Steve, are you _jealous?_" He asks wondrously. Steve blushes and rubs the back of his neck. Tony can't help but laugh, even though it's really sweet, somehow. He drops the screwdriver and crawls into Steve's lap, covering his lips with a kiss. "Don't be silly."

"He's really attractive," Steve admits and gently returns his kiss for a moment before he continues, "And it's not that I don't trust you, it's just that I don't really trust him because you're all kinds of amazing."

"Steve, you're probably the only person who wants a short, smart-mouthed dude with braces," Tony says, but it's so sweet that he kisses Steve again and somehow Steve's hands are suddenly underneath his shirt, then he is half-naked in the blink of an eye and well, he wants to have something to look at as well, so he tugs at Steve's shirt until he can pull it over his head and throw it away.

"Can we—"Steve says and then he just sort of flips him around so that he lies backwards on the bed and holy shit, that's sexy, especially when Steve kneels over him and smiles shyly. Tony touches his face and presses the pad of his thumb gently against Steve's upper lip, shuddering when Steve sucks it into his mouth because damn.

"Can we get naked really fast now, please, that would be awesome," Tony says so fast the words just tumble out of his mouth and Steve smiles, lets go of his thumb and hesitantly reaches for Tony's belt, unbuckling it and sliding it out of his jeans. By the time Steve has let go of Tony's belt, Tony has already opened the button and fly of his jeans and is wriggling out of it, hesitating at his boxers. Instead, he tugs at Steve's jeans, opens it equally fast, even though his fingers are trembling with excitement and a little hint of fear, and Steve helps him equally trembling. When they are done, they both hesitate a little; then, surprisingly, Steve slides between his legs and plays with the waistband of his boxers before he slowly pulls it down a little, then he looks at Tony. "That okay?"

Tony swallows and nods because this is his boyfriend and holy shit does he want to get naked with him, but it's one thing to fantasize about this stuff and something completely different to actually lie underneath him and showing him everything. Steve looks at him intently, but then he pulls Tony's boxers off and breathes out and just looks at him, his hands on Tony's hips. Tony swallows again, but then reaches for Steve's boxers and tugs them off in a swift motion. Then he stares. "Holy fuck, are you serious?"

Steve flushes and squirms a little. Tony is-Tony doesn't know, but his mouth is suddenly very dry and he reaches for Steve's cock, curling his hand around it without even thinking about it. He only comes to realize it when Steve lets out a long groan and digs his hands deeper into Tony's hips and bending down for a kiss. He is so quiet, but Tony soon discovers how he can make him moan and writhe around and then Steve wraps his hand around Tony's cock and it's the most amazing thing ever. _Ever_.

He really hopes there will be a whole day where they will only have sex and eat and sleep a little at some point.

/

"I'm going on a little trip with Bucky," Steve tells him."He's-he's not good at the moment, he's tense and-I don't know. I wasn't a good friend to him the last few weeks. We'll make a nice trip and hopefully he'll talk to me."

"Sounds good," Tony replies and sighs a little. "I guess I'll go home and talk to my parents. I mean, I can't avoid them forever, right?"

"You know you can stay here as long as you want," Steve says gently, "Mom loves you."

"I know," Tony says, "But I don't want to run away from this confrontation for my entire life. I can't hide forever at your home, Steve."

He blinks when Steve takes his face between his hands and studies him silently for a long time before he says quietly, "You know I love you, right?"

"Yeah," Tony says and swallows because his throat suddenly feels tight. "I love you too."

/

When Tony comes home, Jarvis greets him with a smile and freshly-baked cookies.

"Master Tony," He says warmly, "I was very worried about you. Are you fine?"

"Yeah, thanks, Jarvis," Tony says gratefully and bites into one of the cookies, if only to make Jarvis smile even more. "Are my parents here?"

"Yes, Master Tony. Master Stark awaits you in his study."

"Oh," Tony says and nods, tries to ignore the hollow feeling in his stomach. "I'll go meet him, then." He goes before he can think twice about it, knocks on Howard's door and enters when his father says sharply, "Come in".

"Hi, dad," He says and tries to be brave. Howard puts down his pen and just watches him, his moustache bristling a little.

"Sit down, Anthony," He says and it's not a plea, it's an order, so Tony decides to just follow and sits down. He sinks into the chair and really doesn't mind. Howard sighs and folds his hands, then he says, "I should not have hit you."

Tony blinks and says, "What?"

Howard narrows his eyes and says, "You heard me. I should not have hit you. But you do realize what you have done? I need you to keep this down. The media must not know of this. Are we clear? Hopefully this phase will be over soon."

"Dad," Tony says and is very proud that his voice trembles only a little, "It's not a phase. I really, really like him."

Howard shakes his head and picks up his pen again before he continues to write. "Come home again," He says without looking up. "Your mother misses you."

"Do you miss me too?" Tony asks and waits a little, but Howard doesn't reply, so Tony just gets on his feet and clears his throat. "Alright," He says, "Alright, okay."

His mother breaks out in tears and closes her arms around him when he goes to greet her. "I was so worried!" She sobs and Tony blinks again because his mother is almost never here and if she is, she is never overly affectionate. "Don't do this again, Tony! Have you talked to your father yet?"

"Yeah," He replies and finds strange comfort on his mother's hug. "What do you think about it?"

Maria hesitates a little, but then she says quietly, "I talked to-to Steven's mother. She is a very nice person. I-Everything will be okay, Tony, you will see."

/

"Master Tony, there is a call for you," Jarvis tells him and sounds a little worried. "I believe it is quite urgent."

"It's probably just Pepper with her Lucky or however he's called," Tony groans and gets up from his bed, answering the call with a sleepy, "Hello?"

"Tony," Mrs. Rogers says very calmly, "I'm sorry to wake you, but I thought you would want to know. There was an accident, you know. Steve and Bucky-" And now she openly sobs, sniffles, cries, and Tony, who knows her as the strongest woman he has ever met, including Pepper and Natasha, knows her as a woman who has survived her alcoholic husband and thrown him out with her own hands, who has raised her son all alone and raised him well, Tony hears her crumble down. "It's bad, Tony. It's really bad."

Tony drops the phone and meets Jarvis' gaze. "I need your driving skills," He says.

And of course, Maria couldn't be right with her words.

/

"Hey," Sarah Rogers greets him, slumped into one of the ugly, green chairs for visitors. There is a cup of coffee in her hands, but she doesn't drink it; instead, she has just wrapped her hands around it as if it was an anchor.

"Hey," Tony says and sinks down beside her because all of a sudden, he feels exhausted. "How-is he-"

"He's alive," Sarah says and smiles faintly. "They both are. Bucky is being operated right now."

"Operated," Tony echoes and feels sick.

"Tony," Sarah says quietly and takes his hand. "You know I love you like my own son. Steve is so happy with you." She swallows and squeezes his hand. "He's in a coma, Tony. The doctors say it's quite possible he'll wake up in the next few days, but it's also possible he'll suffer from amnesia and I…I don't know." It comes out as a sob. "I don't know. He's my baby, he- I can't believe this is happening."

/

Bucky wakes up first. Tony jumps when he hears him groan and he tries not to-he tries not to look at the bloody stump covered in bandages where once Bucky's right arm was, but it's hard. It looks alien, strange; foreign. Tony tries not to think about it too hard because now Bucky looks at him. He is sluggish from the drugs they put him under and Tony is grateful for that.

"Hey," Tony says and clears his throat and suddenly has the realization that he is too young for this; that this shouldn't happen, not at all, that it can't be true that one of his best friend lost his arm at the age of seventeen and his boyfriend will probably never wake up. This is not how it should be. This is not what he wanted. This is not what he dreamed of. He doesn't voice anything of this. Instead, he says, "Thank God you're awake. We were all worried about you."

"There was this truck," Bucky says drowsily and watches him. "I only remember the lights. Where is Steve?"

"He's," Tony says and swallows, "He's in a coma."

Bucky says nothing; then he suddenly throws away the blanket and tries to get up, only to fall back onto the mattress because one arm is missing and now Bucky has discovered it, stills, stares at the stump and the blood slowly soaking the bandages.

"Tony," He says quietly, "Tony, where is my arm? _Where is my arm_?"

"Bucky-" Tony tries, but suddenly Bucky yells, "Where is my fucking arm, Tony? I want my arm back! I need to get to Steve! Steve! Steve!"

"It's gonna be alright, Bucky," Tony says, but it's too quiet to drown out the noises of the nurses filtering into the room to sedate Bucky. At some point, he doesn't know if he tries to convince Bucky or himself.

/

Tony watches Sarah pray. She looks gracefully, silently trading the Rosary through her fingers with bowed head and closed eyes. She doesn't speak. She doesn't even move her lips.

"Why do you believe in God?" He asks her because he really wants to know. Sarah looks up and smiles at him.

"This is the question everybody asks, isn't it," She says and doesn't sound angry at all, "Especially at this time I find great console in it, my boy. It may seem weak, but we all need something to hold on to. There is something like God for everyone. Just because you don't believe in my God doesn't mean you don't believe in anything at all. Maybe you believe in Science? In yourself? Everything is fine. I believe in God because I grew up loving Him and have loved Him since I was a little girl."

"But how can you not lose faith in God after all this?" Tony asks because he honestly doesn't understand.

"Things happen, Tony," She says gently. "He gave me my boy and He made him good. I know He will not let him die, not now. I believe in it."

"I wish I could believe in God, too," Tony says.

/

Bucky never stays down from a fight, so naturally, Bucky fights. Tony doesn't know if he should be glad about that or not because there is no method in Bucky's fight. He doesn't eat. He doesn't speak. He crawls out of bed and escapes from his room as soon as his nurses turn their backs towards him and he's good with not getting caught. He always goes into Steve's room and sits on his bed beside Tony for hours. At some time, the medical staff declares defeat and rolls a second bed in Steve's room to get Bucky to "lie the fuck down," as a very stressed, young doctor commands.

Bucky's father doesn't show up even once.

Bucky still doesn't speak. Barely moves. Rarely responds if someone talks to him. "Shellshock," The doctors say, "Posttraumatic Stress-Disorder," But Tony doesn't know what that means and he doesn't really care. All he cares about is Bucky being hurt and lost somewhere Tony can't follow him to and he desperately wants to make it better.

Instead, Natasha does it for him.

At some point, she must have been informed about the accident, because one day, she's just there, looks at Bucky, takes his hand and murmurs soft, Russian words into his ear. Bucky still doesn't answer, but now, to Natasha, he listens. She stays. The nurses sigh and try very hard not find them all admirably loyal and brave and adorable, but they do roll in another bed and slowly the room gets really crowded, but Natasha crawls into Bucky's bed without even asking and Tony finds himself having a bed all on his own. However, he rarely sleeps. He spends his hours just looking at Steve, who looks as if he was only sleeping, even though half of his face and neck is covered in bruises.

He tries not to blink too often and finds himself feeling guilty when he does.

/

And then, Tony wakes up one day, looks at Bucky and Natasha curled against each other in their sleep, and suddenly knows what to do.

/

"I don't think you're leaving him alone if you go home for a few days, Tony, and so won't he," Sarah says. She looks tired, but her smile is warm as ever and she hugs Tony tightly. "Just go. We know you'll be back soon. And don't feel guilty. We will be alright."

"Okay," Tony says because really, what should he say? Everything he needs is at his workshop at home, so he needs to go. And he does. Arrives at home and opens the door of his father's study without knocking. For a moment, Howard and he silently look at each other; then Howard sighs and puts down his pen.

"I heard about the accident," He says.

"I need your help," Tony says and shows him his plan.

/

"Look at this plastic shit," Bucky says and snorts. "What is that? Am I a puppet? Look at that, Nateschka, I am the prettiest mannequin out there." He jiggles around with the pretty much useless prosthetic the doctor came with today and Tony doesn't know if he is allowed to laugh or not because hello, sensitive topic, but it looks really stupid.

"This looks really stupid," Natasha says dryly. The doctor glares at her accusingly. Bucky snorts again and lets go of the fake arm, straps it off and throws it across the room. He almost smashes the TV and really smashes a vase nobody ever needed. Bucky's favorite nurse rushes in and lifts an eyebrow at the broken pieces on the floor.

"Thank God that thing is finally broken," She says and smiles serenely when the doctor glares at her too. "I'll get a broom."

/

"Thanks, dad," Tony says.

"Stop talking and continue working, boy," Howard replies, but he seems a little more relaxed, now that he is in the workshop and elbows-deep in wires and metal. "Now press that button. Either it works or everything'll blow up."  
He sounds more excited about this option than Tony has ever heard him being excited about anything.

/

"You know I am here for you," Pepper says softly and hugs him. Tony gets hugged a lot these days; Steve still hasn't woken up, even though everybody waits for him to do so. His bruises are slowly fading away, at least.

"Okay," Tony says a little helpless, "Pep?"

"Yes?"

"I…I think we need a new keyboarder."

Pepper is silent for several minutes; Tony doesn't know if she is mad at him or not, but then she sighs and says, "I'll take care of it."

/

The funny thing is, life just goes on, no matter what happens.

"Hey, Steve," Tony says and gently takes Steve's hand. "So this is the daily update. You've been asleep for exactly nine weeks and three days now. I'm not gonna count the hours and minutes, 'cause that would be just pathetic. The doctors say your brain activity has increased a little in the last days, which is really cool, but I'm greedy and want you to wake up. I know it's stupid but I miss your smile."

"Anyways, today's my birthday!"

"Happy sweet seventeen," Bucky comments dryly. Natasha gives him a look. Tony has gotten better at guessing what she means with her looks.

"Shut up, Bucky," Tony says and continues, "I guess it's a little unusual to celebrate a birthday in the hospital, but-well, you know, I wanted to be with you. God, that was cheesy, forget that line. Uh, anyways, I got some neat stuff. The only thing that's missing is, well, you, but at least you're not dead, so that's something. Also, you got the best mom ever, seriously. I don't know whether my mom would sit at my bed every day and cut my nails and shave my face and stuff."

"Can I say something too?" Bucky asks and Tony looks up.

"Sure," He says, because really, he doesn't own Steve or something.

"Hey, punk," Bucky says, "I'm fighting. Move your ass and fight too, will ya, I need you."

/

"Well, boy, this looks very good!" Tony's dentist exclaims. "You have the prettiest wisdom teeth I have ever seen and that tells something; do you have any idea how many teeth I have already seen in my life?"

"Hah heeeeeh hooooo hihheee," Tony says. His dentist pats his head.

"Not many people get their wisdom teeth this early and in this uncomplicated fashion," He says, "You're really lucky."

He is very surprised when Tony starts laughing.

/

"Are you fucking serious?" Bucky asks.

"Language, my boy," Sarah says.

"Are you damn serious?" Bucky corrects himself. Sarah sighs, but her eyes are happier than they have been in a long time. "And this will _work_? Are you _sure_?"

"Of course I am," Tony says indignantly. "I'm a genius, remember? C'mon, try it out. Or are you too afraid?"

"Fuck you," Bucky says with a charming smile. Sarah hits him lightly on the back of his head and Bucky laughs, the first time he has in ages.

"There will be an operation necessary and it will hurt like a motherfucker since there will be a lot about connecting the nerves of your shoulder to that shit," Tony warns.

"Another one?" Bucky says and laughs again; it sounds a little maniac. "C'mon, man, that all? Just gimme all you've got. I miss my right hand."

Tony snorts.

/

And then, just like that, Steve wakes up.

For about five minutes. Tony is so happy that he can't help but burst out in tears. Bucky, snotty and red-eyed himself, swears to never tell anyone.

/

"Mom?" Steve says drowsily and blinks slowly like a drugged owl. Sarah, bless her, doesn't cry or scream or faint; she just takes his hand and presses it gently.

"Hello, my little lion heart," She says quietly, "How are you?"

Tony holds his breath and tries not to lunge forward, to press himself against Steve and inhale his scent, never let go until the end of days. Bucky is out, still recovering from the operation that connected the nerves of his shoulder with the wires that will be the nerves in his new arm, but Tony's pretty sure that he'll wake up soon.

"My head hurts," Steve says weakly and closes his eyes. Tony jumps on his feet and dims the lights before shutting the curtains. "What happened?"

"You don't remember anything?" Sarah asks.

"I don't know. I was with…" Steve frowns. Frowns harder. Opens his eyes and looks helplessly at his mother. "I can't-I know his face, but…I can't remember the name, mom."

"Oh, dear, " Sarah sighs before she pats his hand, "It's alright. We'll figure everything out together, yes? Hey, I'm sure you remember him. Tony, come here."

Tony tries not to panic and shuffles closer, unconsciously wringing his hands. Steve looks at him; he still has that frown on his face, but slowly it starts to look as panicked as Tony feels.

"Hey, Steve," Tony says and Steve sort of smiles at him, but it looks unsure.

"I'm sorry," He says and Tony's stomach sinks. "I-" Tony's eyes widen when Steve lifts a hand and gently touches his cheek, still looking at him intently. "I do know you, but…It's all very….I don't really…"

"It's fine," Tony says and breathes in, "It's okay. We'll fix you. I'm good with fixing things."

/

"How are they?" Bruce asks and does that thing where he just looks at someone, completely focuses on him. Bruce does that sometimes; it's one of the things Tony likes most about him. He never managed to do that, just sit there and focus so intently on a single person. There are always so many things to do, so why shouldn't he work on them while listening to someone when he manages to do both at the same time? It's just that it's not the same kind of thing for the person who talks to him; he guesses it puts a lot of people off if the person you want to tell something tinkers around or does something else while listening to you. It gives the impression that he isn't really listening at all, which is not what Tony wants so seem like, but he can't really help himself. The only time he gets close to that kind of focus is when he is with Steve and even then, it's just that all the numbers and equations in his head form themselves around Steve, what he is, what he means to him, what he makes him feel like. It's the best of focus he can do.

"They're both better, even though the doctors say that Steve will- will have some difficulties in talking and remembering for the next months." He doesn't say that some of them think that a part of the damage will be permanent; he refuses to believe that. "Bucky's doing pretty good, the operation was successful so far and now we'll do a few tests and physiotherapy and hopefully he'll be back in school soon."

"I still can't believe you build him an arm and connected it to his body," Bruce says and shakes his head. "I don't know how you could do that."

"I had some help from dad and talked to some of the leading physicians and robot-engineers of the world," Tony says and tries to sound modest, but he isn't really successful. "I think dad thinks about giving me some space in the Stark Industries R&D, he was pretty excited about the whole thing."

"So he's not mad at you for—you know, Steve and stuff?"

"To be honest, I guess he's in huge denial about that," Tony says and shrugs. "I don't know. I'm not really asking him, you know. Better not wake sleeping dragons."

/

"Okay, now grab it," Tony says.

"Dude, I _can't_," Bucky hisses and it sounds a lot frustrated, which, okay, Tony can understand, but still, Bucky isn't even trying at all. "Besides, it's all slippery and stuff from your hands, which, by the way, eugh."

"Shut up, asshole," Tony says because Bucky is not the only one being frustrated here. This should be easier by now. It's not and that's worrying. "Just grab it and give it a good squeeze."

"You know, that sounds pretty wrong," Bucky says after a slight pause.

"I mean the _bear_," Tony clarifies and rolls his eyes. "Just take the goddamn bear, Barnes, it's not that hard, you can do it, this arm is awesome."

They both yell in relief a minute later.

/

"So, the band is still a thing?" Rhodey asks and sighs when one of his guys stumbles over his own feet in his haste.

"HULK HAVE NO OF YOUR SHIT!"

"Dude, yes, nothing can stop me from attending a band contest with my very own band and win the shit," Tony says and rubs over his nose.

"I really have no idea where you take it from after everything that happened," Rhodey says and sounds almost impressed. "So much determination from such a little guy, it's almost a little inspiring."

"I'm not little," Tony says indignantly, but Rhodey just ruffles his hair.

"So you're keeping Clint?" He asks.

"I like him," Tony admits and sighs. "Besides, Bucky insists that his time as keyboarder is over. He doesn't want to try to play piano or keyboard again and he can be surprisingly stubborn."

"Surprisingly?" Rhodey echoes and snorts.

"Well, yes, you wouldn't believe it what with how charming and easy he usually is, right?" Tony returns and can't help laughing a little.

"So, does this mean you finally got a band name?"

/

"So," Steve says and folds his hands in his lap. They're in his room; Steve is home for the first time in ages and it was sad, watching him looking at his own room and remembering next to nothing. It panicked him a little, but now he's calm again, sitting on his bed next to Tony. Tony looks at Steve's hands and tries not to reach for them.

"So?" He echoes when Steve doesn't continue.

"You're my boyfriend?" Steve says a little hesitantly. It's the first time they are able to talk alone. Back in the hospital, there was constantly someone hovering over them; either it was Bucky, Natasha or Sarah or it was a nurse or doctor, sometimes even all of them at the same time.

"Uh, yeah?" Tony answers, "You remember being gay, right? Can you forget something like that? Because if you did, well, that would be a little shitty, you know."

"I remember being gay," Steve says and smiles a little. "How long have we been-" He searches for the right word and sighs when he doesn't find it. "Sorry. I feel-pretty stupid. I can't remember some-" He sighs again. "Well, words, but that wasn't what I wanted to-never mind. How long have we been-" He frowns a little.

"How long have we been together?" Tony guesses and Steve nods, obviously feeling relieved. "Uhm, quite a while now, it's been a year and five months. You being comatose included. You- you still want this, right? Or is this you breaking up with me?"

"I think you're really-you look-" Steve groans and rubs the back of his neck. "Sorry. I don't want to break up with you. I'm just sorry I need to-get to know you all over again."

"That's alright," Tony says and means it.

/

"You want the girl, right?" Tony asks.

"Of course I want the goddamn girl," Bucky snaps. It's hilarious when he ruins his attitude by looking around as if being afraid of Natasha's reaction if she heard him call her 'goddamn girl'.

"Then go get her," Tony says, "She broke up with Clint yesterday. They're still friends, though. I don't know how they can do that."

"Me neither," Bucky says and rubs his chin. "I wouldn't talk to her for at least a year if she broke up with me."

"Well, to try that out you have to get together with her first," Tony reminds him. "Any ideas?"

"Dude, I wrote her a song, complete with tune and stuff, I was pretty bored and a little high from the meds," Bucky says. "Look at it and tell me that it isn't fucking awesome. I'm like Beethoven, only I'm not deaf."

Tony looks at it. Then he says, "I want you to write more of that shit."

/

"So we really never went on a date?" Steve asks and sounds mildly horrified.

"Not like this, no," Tony says, "I mean, we're underneath the stars. With candles and shit. And there is AC/DC playing from the iPod dock station."

"Which I don't think is generally a band that's played on a date," Steve says, but he looks amused, so Tony just grins at him.

"Doesn't matter," He says and tries not to die from excitement when Steve takes his hand.

"Hey, Tony?" Steve says.

"Yeah?" Tony says.

"I remember a lot of you," Steve says and smiles. Then he leans in for the first kiss since he woke up and Tony-well, Tony's heart stops for a second, but nobody needs to know, really.

/

"Okay, people, let's play some music!" Pepper says and claps her hand. Tony waves at Steve, who sits in the corner and waves back with a smile. Natasha looks at Bucky, who grins at her before he elbows Steve.

"I'm all for that, but first I want to ask a question," Bruce says.

"Okay, Bruce," Tony says magnanimously, "You're allowed to. It's a free country."

"How nice of you," Bruce says dryly and takes off his glasses to wipe them clean. "Am I the only one who thinks it's sad that we still don't have a band name?"

"Circus of life," Clint says promptly. They all look at him, so he shrugs and says, "I love the circus, okay? Besides, Lion King is one of my favorites. It would be a hilarious pun."

"It is one of my beloved movies too," Thor exclaims gravely. "It always reminds me of mine brother and me."

"Ooookay," Tony says after a slight pause, "Not going there. But I have a proposal."

"I do," Steve says without hesitation and laughs when Tony goes pale. "Just kidding, Tony, we're a little too young for that."

"Golden," Tony says promptly.

"Schto?" Natasha answers and sounds confused.

"I have no idea what that meant, but I don't care, so it's fine," Tony says, "Golden. We should call the band golden. 'Cause, you know. There were a lot of good things in the last year for all of us, but also a shit ton of really bad ones. Bucky lost his arm."

"Got a better one," Bucky says.

"Natasha thought she'd lost Bucky."

Natasha doesn't say anything, but she nods and shares a long look with Bucky. It's Bucky, who breaks the gaze first.

"Steve was in a fucking coma and I thought I lost him forever."

"You didn't," Steve says and his eyes are soft and too old for his age.

"Bruce lost his job as the mascot of the football team because he destroyed an entire tribune."

"I have anger management issues, I even got medically tested," Bruce says and sighs resignedly. "I'll try with another team."

"Thor got thrown out of his old school and had to start all over again."

"Ah, but I found true friends and my lady Jane, so it is alright," Thor exclaims in protest. Tony rolls his eyes.

"Clint-what the fuck happened to you, Clint?"

"Accidentally burned down a house and got shot down," Clint says and shrugs again when everybody looks at him. "Look, everybody has their secrets, okay? Don't judge."

"Whatever," Tony says, "Point is: We survived everything and everything turned out-yeah, probably not fine, but still really good. And we're here and we're young and we're alive and we're winners. And what do winners get? Gold. So, Golden. I think that would be pretty cool, you know. It would be symbolic. We are winners. We are golden."

There is silence for a few moments in which Tony looks around a little worried because he really thought about this, alright?

"I think that this is really good," Natasha says and actually smiles. It's a little scary. "I'm in."

"Me too," Thor exclaims happily.

"I still think Circus of Life would be better, but whatever," Clint says and grins.

"It's good, I like the thought behind it," Bruce says quietly.

"It's better than The Flying Monkeys," Bucky admits, "I'd listen to that shit."

Beside him, Steve smiles warmly at Tony and nods. Pepper smiles too and tucks a strand of hair behind her ears. Tony looks at her, looks at the people that have become his, somehow, and takes a deep breath, then he closes a hand around the microphone.

"Alright," He says into it and looks eyes with Steve. "Ladies and gentlemen: This is Golden. The first song goes to our guitarist, Natasha." And then he takes a deep breath and starts something new, something exciting.

And it's not perfect, but it's perfect for them, right now, right here.

/GOLDEN/


End file.
